wildaspie

I’ve never really been a “joiner.”  As I browse blogs I see all kinds of affiliation badges: Mommy Bloggers.  Eco Carders.  Christian groups; divorce support networks; single parents; weight loss; crafters …

Although I have children, I don’t consider myself a “mommy blogger” – I am definitely not one of those women who feel their lives revolve around their little darlings.  I love my children and they are important parts of my life.  But only parts: I am still a *person* with my own interests and goals.  Being a mother is not the end-all, be-all of my day.

I also have a Husband, but again, I do not stop being me because I am a wife.  We unschool the kids, but the other homeschoolers near us are too different (most are using Christian curricula, and a few that aren’t have family-raising views too different from our own to make me comfortable with the thought of interacting with them).

I’m mostly agnostic, as is my Husband; the children are largely undecided, although the eldest finds Buddhism agreeable most of the time.  (Not always; she likes meat too much to become a frugavore.)

I suppose I just don’t understand the “join” mentality.  When I was young I never fit in with my peers, and perhaps that failure in those formative years set the pattern I have today.  Whenever I find a group of people I have something in common with, I find myself focused more on the inevitable differences.

The only exception to this has been the drum circle I attend during the warm months.  I think, mostly, I have been able to participate because they only meet once a month and because it’s a very casual affair.  I can show up or not, and it doesn’t mean I do or not belong.  And, most everyone there also self-identifies as not being able to belong anywhere else, so it is that very comfortable environment of a group that does not like groups.

The irony is delicious.